Riding a Crocodile by Paul Komesaroff

Author:Paul Komesaroff [Komesaroff, Paul]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 978-1-938416-51-4
Publisher: River Grove Books
Published: 2014-03-15T00:00:00+00:00

Reading the letter, Abraham thought of his own childhood and wished that he had been loved like Benjamin. He thought of the devotion shown to Mr. Alvarez by his family and to Mrs. Dreyfus by her two daughters. Mechanically, he collected his things and went off to see Mrs. Simpson, as he had promised to do, before visiting his father at Swamp Road Hospital.

51.

In Mrs. Simpson’s room, Abraham spoke briefly to the nurse responsible for her care and then examined the patient. Although still unconscious, she was a little more responsive than she had been in the morning, which reinforced the feelings he had expressed about her illness.

He thanked the nurse for her assistance and turned to go. As he was leaving, he almost bumped into Helen, the third daughter, who was coming in to visit her mother. Flustered and obviously very agitated, she asked if she could talk with him as a matter of urgency. In spite of his hurry he felt he had no alternative. As soon as he closed the door of the interview room Helen burst into tears.

“Professor, I don’t want my mother to die. I know my sisters think that it’s best to allow her to go now, but I don’t, and I believe that my father doesn’t, either. I know it’s been hard for Mom. She’s really battled all these years. But there’s no reason for her to give in now. Gill and Chris think that her life’s not worth anything anymore and they want Dad to be able to move on while he’s still young enough. I’m sure they mean well, but they’re just trying to impose their will on everyone else. They’ve made it so hard for Mom. They’ve put pressure on her for years to go to a nursing home, but she’s refused. That’s why I went overseas. I couldn’t stand the conflict anymore. I had to escape. It was better, healthier for me living away from home. But in the end I couldn’t stay away: I had to come back. When I did, I was convinced that Mom had made up her mind to end it. She just couldn’t resist any longer. She didn’t say so directly but I could see it in her eyes and in her body. I don’t know what she’d planned or what she actually did, but I’m sure she did something. She’s a strong woman and she always knows exactly what she’s doing. She only meant the best for Dad, but he just wanted to be with her, whatever her condition, and whatever it meant for them together. In the end, neither of them could continue to withstand the pressure. I tried to reason with her. I argued with her, but she rejected me. She shouted at me that I had left her. I was her favorite. She loved me best, but she accused me of betraying her. I left because it was the only way I could survive. That was the last conversation we had.

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